EverAfterLand

PhotoStory Friday - First, I'd Like to Thank the Little People...

Hosted by Cecily and MamaGeek

What with it being "awards season," I thought I'd show off the little statuette Miss Priss was the recipient of two years ago...

So where does she keep her Oscar? 

Why, in the toybox, of course!

Because The Universe Hates My Blog, That's Why.

If you haven't noticed, we at Happily-Ever-After-Land have been a little absent from the bloggy world lately. 

I swear, it wasn't me. 

OK, maybe it was me a little bitty bit. 

Well, first off, the in-laws were in town for a week.  And as with any addiction, the last thing you want to do is let outsiders SEE just how addicted you are.  So I stayed away from the computer, you know, to show how much I do NOT have a problem. 

Because if you can have a computer on in your home and not be glued to it, then you're not an addict, right?

Then we took off for four days in Monterey, California (which is gorgeous, by the way).  Hubster made sure he had the laptop packed.  Maybe because I had reminded him, oh, five or fifty times.  I was jonesing by then, and was very hopeful that computer time would be alright whilst the wee lass took her afternoon naps and after she went to bed.  But, lo and behold, the internet at our lodgings cost MONEY.  And, apparently, The Hubs doesn't think my bloggy interests are worth $9 a day.  Couldn't argue with him about it, though, cause only an addict would argue that point, and we were still with the in-laws.

But that's OK!  Eventually we made it back home.  Except by then we had one day to get packed and ready to leave for a 10-day trip to Iowa.  Well, me and Miss Priss.  Hubbawubba gets to take a cruise off the California coastline for a couple weeks, compliments of The Navy.

So we drove down to San Diego, where our flight and his boat were taking off from.  We had a couple days before leaving, though.  "Great!" I thought, "I'll have some downtime to at LEAST get a post up so people don't think I'm dead!" And I promptly spent the morning attempting to connect the laptop to the FREE internet connection.

How many people does it take to hook up one computer to the World Wide Web?

Well, I'll tell ya, a whole lot!  Especially when the entire phone system is out on base (did I forget to mention we were staying on a base?), which is necessary for the DSL to work, and they have no idea when it will be repaired.

And this, folks, was the moment I realized that The Universe just doesn't like my blog.

Why?  I dunno.  I always thought I spoke nicely of The Universe.  Maybe I looked at it funny one day.  Maybe The Universe thought I was getting a little too big for my britches, what with my growing following of, like, 5 followers.

But The Universe couldn't stay mad at me for long!  I just batted my big brown puppy-dog eyes, squeezed out a couple tears, and got the bottom lip quivering.  (Incidentally, this is also a favored technique when trying to score the last piece of chocolate cake from The Hubster.)  We never did get the internet to work in Cali, but we're at Grandma's house now.  And we may be freezing our patookies off here in the Midwest, but at least I've got my mom's laptop to keep me warm!!!

We'll be heading back to Cali after the first of the month and back to some semblance of a normal routine.

Do you suppose my addiction has been broken, what with all this time away from my beloved computer?

I think it's going to take a lot more than a short break to reverse the brainwashing that's been done on me!

Family of the Year - Lucky to be Alive!

I'm bAAAAAaaaaaack!!

And, boy, have I missed you all!

I'll give you an explanation of where I've been tomorrow, in the meantime, here's the Mommy of the Year post that was supposed to go up LAST week.

I think I had mentioned before that my in-laws were coming to town.  Well, they came and went and, although she had a great time with her grandparents, Miss Priss certainly had a price to pay for all her fun!

(Please don't call CPS on us....)

 

A) Grandpa managed to slam the lens of his camera into Priss' forehead when he was trying to help her into the house after a trip to the park.

B) Poor Grandpa was lifting Priss onto the platform of a jungle gym and was so busy trying to plant her feet on the platform, he didn't notice the metal crossbar directly above it. 

C) OK, I'm attributing this one to Grandma, despite the fact there wasn't anything she could have done to prevent it, because it's the only damage I can come close to pinning on her!  Priss went down a spiral slide, turned around and flipped over, and when Grandma picked her up at the bottom, Priss had blood on her face.  At first I thought it was her nose, but upon closer inspection, it was a small cut inside her lip. 

D) We all took a trip to Hearst Castle, one of those spots that refuse to let you take a stroller on the tour.  How lucky, we thought, that they had one of those hiking backpack kiddie carrier things.  Hubster slung it onto his back and, after much wrangling on my part that I can only liken to hog tying a baby pig, Priss was securely inside.  She hated it, but piped down after a bit.  Then we got to the stairs.  The kind with the ceiling going at the same angle as the steps.  I heard "THUD" and turned around to see Priss' head scrapping along the ceiling.  Way to go, Daddy!

E) This last one was all Mama's fault.  I was rushing to get Priss into her carseat and, you guessed it, hit her forehead square on the top of the door frame.

At this point, I wouldn't blame the poor girl for wanting to run away from home.

PhotoStory Friday - The Soup

Hosted by Cecily and MamaGeek

I have seen that horror movie "The Fog" but it never occurred to me that fog could exist in such a fashion.

(Alright, fine!  I LIED!!!  I hate horror movies and NEVER saw "The Fog."  But I did see the commercials, and I think I can assume the general plot of the film.)

So now we're here in Central Valley, California and, aside from the constant smell of cow, we are now smack dab in the middle of "Foggy Season."

Damn near everyday we find our morning shrouded in a dense white soup (well, more like a watered-down clam chowder, without the chunks).

Yeah, we had a White Christmas, alright.  It just didn't involve snow.

Here's a photo of The Hubster taking off for work... 

Have you all seen the movie?  Should I be worried????

This Baby is Kicking my Ass!

That's right, I said ASS.

As in A.S.S.

Cause this isn't funny, folks.  And I've got no energy left to mince words!

I have neglected everything bloggy these last few weeks.  No commenting, no emailing.  I can barely bolster enough energy to get a post up once in a while.

I wish I could say I've been spending my computer-free time knitting a baby blanket.  Or sewing the Christmas stockings.  Or learning how to use my new sewing machine.  But no.

I've just been sitting on my ASS. 

And judging by the snugness of my stretchy pants, that ass has increased in size by about 25% since all this started. 

Yeah, for all you haters out there who were enraged at the fact that I get to skip the whole "morning sickness" thing, you now have something to gloat over. 

If there's no puking, there's only EATING!  There, are you happy now?

Well that's about it for today.  I just spent the morning hammering out my latest post for The Classy Closet.  So if you just can't get enough of me, head on over there and check it out!

In the meantime, just know that I miss you all and I'm very hopeful that I will resume a little bit of my formerly energetic self as these weeks progress.  Thank you so much for continuing to throw a comment my way every once in a while.  I do manage to read them, even if I can't seem to make my fingers work long enough to shoot you a reply.

Now, back to my couch and my bagel.  Buttered with half the tub, of course.

Mommy of the Year - Make that Housekeeper of the Year

You know your housekeeping skills would be the envy of Donna Reed when your two year old daughter insists on periodically hitting the floor to clean off bits of whatever from the bottoms of her feet every time she walks through the kitchen.

Don't worry, folks, we've got the in-laws coming into town tomorrow, so the place will be spotless by then.  Normal people do "Spring Cleaning," in Happily-Ever-After-Land, we do "House Guest Cleaning."  Thank the good lord for 'em, though - imagine the kind of squalor we would be living in if it weren't for the occasional company coming!

And somewhere in the arctic tundra known as "Iowa," my mom is banging her head against her desk asking herself where, oh where did she go wrong.  Sorry, Mamacita, I was BORN bad!

Or, well, not so much BAD as DIRTY!

Need some more examples of stellar Mommy Moments?  Then head on over to Our Simple Life where Julia documents the steady downfall of her adorable tots.  This one had me rolling on the floor, definitely one for the Mommy of the Year Hall of Fame!  (And maybe someday I'll actually create a "Hall of Fame," but for now, you'll just have to be happy with what ya got!)

PhotoStory Friday - Won't YOU Help?

Hosted by Cecily and MamaGeek

Look at this face.

This is the face of a sailor soldier SUFFERING.

(Yep, soldier definitely sounds better.)

A soldier who served his country during three wars (although the first probably shouldn't count since he was in college at the time - but they still gave him a medal for it!) and served bravely.

OK, so maybe he never saved, like, a platoon of people from harm, but he DID get a medal for giving officers from the Mexican Navy (yeah, I didn't know they had one either) a tour of the ship he was stationed on.  (Geez, they'll give you a medal for a good hair day, won't they?)

This brave, handsome, smokin' hot sailor is now left crippled.  Injured.  Bruised. 

Through a freak accident at a basketball game played (apparently too aggressively) with other brave and noble sailors, he is now left with an ankle SPRAINED (he'll probably still get a medal though).

What will become of this stud muffin of a sailor?  How will he learn to adjust to a life of crutches?  Who will feed his family while he's incapacitated? 

For just $19.95, less than the price of a week's worth of coffee (cause I assume you're all loaded and only drink Starbuck's every day), you can help this sailor and his family.  Your dollars will help them hire a nurse so his wife doesn't have to get off her ass to help him.  They will be able to obtain the cook they so desperately need, allowing them to eat nutritious meals, since the wife would gladly feed them McDonalds every day rather than turn on the oven.

Yes, for only $19.95, YOU can help this family make it through the next, oh, four of five days while this brave, adorable, pathetic looking sailor soldier makes it through recovery.

Just make your check payable to Jennifer at Happily-Ever-After-Land....

(Disclaimer:  Because Karma's a bitch, and I have a real fear of tempting fate, I must point out that there are too many truly injured soldiers and their families out there that need REAL help.  Charity Navigator has a list of just a few of the charities that can use your support.)

(Oh, and before Hubby gets too mad, let me point out that he really has done some very cool and dangerous things to earn his medals [and I'm not talking about the Mexicans!].  I joke because I'd really rather not think about it!)

I have the smartest readers in the world!

You would all make great detectives!

Well, at least on one of those children's detective shows, anyway! 

I do have to tell you, though, that all of your congratulatory comments really made my day - thank you all so much for taking a minute to send them to me!

We are due in mid-August (and by WE I mean ME), and I am one of those hated women that does not get sick during pregnancy, so I'm feeling really good right now!  Just very, EXTREMELY hungry.  I mean, we'll have a really great, balanced, healthy meal that I'll dig into like some kind of wild animal for dinner, and by bedtime, I have to eat a frozen waffle, just so the pangs of hunger don't keep me awake.  You know, the waffle, or a pint of Ben & Jerry's. 

Did I mention I've already gained four pounds in four weeks?  Yeah, we're off to a GREAT start!

We recently had our first ultrasound at 8 weeks and everything looks fantastic!  I'm sorry to say, though, that the doctor gave us the WORST uterus picture EVER.  Somewhere in my medical file there exists ten other pics of my little sprout that actually looks sort of like a baby (if you squint your eyes and hop on one foot).  But this pic - just a lump of fuzz.

So, the following is an artist's rendering (and by "artist" I mean "me and a box of crayons") of what the ultrasound photo SHOULD have looked like.  Enjoy!

  Oh, and hubs is ALREADY quizzing me on why the baby looks so Asian.  I was, all, whatever!  Can we at least bring the little guy into the world BEFORE we have this argument???

Woo Hoo! It's the Big 1-0-0!!!

Yes, folks, we here at Happily-Ever-After-Land have just turned 100!

100 Posts, that is!

I tossed and turned all weekend trying to figure out the perfect 100th Post that would properly celebrate and encapsulate, well, 100 Posts!

Unfortunately, my brain hasn't been working quite right (all this potty training can really drive a person to insanity!), so you'll have to settle for this.

The Happily-Ever-After-Land bathroom!  I figured, it's what all women LOVE to do, right?  Snoop and spy in another woman's bathroom.

So, here ya go!  Happy 100! 

And be sure to let me know what you think this little corner of my bath world says about me!

PhotoStory Friday - Cheeeese!

Hosted by Cecily and MamaGeek

That's it!  Just one little picture for this week's PhotoStory.  I know, it doesn't look like much.

More cookie pictures?  Did you forget to take any for Christmas???  Or New Year's, for that matter!
Well, no, we have Christmas pictures, I just really liked this one....

And what the heck happened to your make-up?  Geez, take a little pride in yourself!
Harsh!  OK, I didn't know we were gonna do photos.  Hubs just walked in and started snapping away!

You're a blogger.  Of COURSE you'd take photos!
Gee whiz!  I did lighten my teeth a little in PhotoShop and give myself some eyebrows, if you HAVE to know!

There is a method to my madness (at least, this time, anyway).

This photo is HISTORIC.

MONUMENTAL, in fact.

This is the very first photo that Miss Priss smiled, looked at the camera and said, "Cheeese!" with her head smashed up against mine, party girl style.  She hasn't willingly smiled at the camera in over a year, let alone actually POSE for a picture!

But something got in her that morning.  Maybe it was the joy of sprinkles.  Maybe it was the fumes from the baking cookies.  Maybe it was the fact that mommy had no make-up on so she thought I wouldn't actually use this pic (HA!  Like THAT would stop me!)

So there it is, folks, our first ever Mommy/Daughter Portrait!

<sob!>  She's practically off to college!!!!  <boo hoo ho hoooo!>