EverAfterLand

Tabby Tuesday

Slowly getting back into the groove of bloggy life!  Today is Tuesday (at least, I think it is.  Maybe I should check.....Yep, it's Tuesday!) and every Tuesday I write up a little tabloid talking post called The Meltdown for The Posh Parent.  This week I recount the straw that broke the camel's back in the Madonna/Ritchie Split, list some of the new celebrity babies out there, and give you the latest on Jennifer Hudson's family tragedy.

Check it all out here!

The Eagles Have Landed...

Yes, folks, your favorite Happily-Ever-After-Landers have arrived at their final destination, safe and sound!  It was a looooong trip (with the dog and the kid), but we are now California residents once again and have been busily unpacking all the crap that we swore we could NOT live without.

I find I learn something from each of our various moves.  So what did I learn from the Iowa to Cali Move of 2008?

• No matter how hard I try, it is impossible for me to pack up an entire house all by myself.  Consequently, the fact that hubby came home and we had to turn it around in three days turned out to be very, very BAD idea.  From here on out, I am NEVER packing up a whole house by myself ever, EVER again.
• It doesn't matter how many "healthy" snacks you pack, you will only eat the junk that you find during your frequent stops.
• When hubby says, "I have a great idea for eating healthy!  We'll stop at grocery stores along the way, cause most of them have pre-made sandwiches and salad bars!," just go along with it.  No point arguing that you know, FOR A FACT, that they don't show grocery stores on those signs along the highway, or that grocery stores do not exist in most of the small town stops we make.  Just let him have his moment.
• When you're on day three and your kid thinks "shy-shies" (that's french fries to the rest of you) is a food group and you and hubby are on your fifth meal that involved a "Run to the Border," hold in the urge to yell out "I told you so!"  If, however, said urge is too much to resist, make sure declaration is made at one of those fancy gas stations or truck stops - some place you don't mind being left at for a few hours.
• More Mickey DVD's.  We only had three Mickey Mouse Clubhouse videos, and I now know all of them by heart.
• Wind Farms are all the rage right now.  If you want to be one of the cool kids, get yourself a windmill and plunk it in your front yard.
• It's very creepy to see one wind turbine spinning very so slowly, all by itself against the stark, flat farmland.  Gave me visions of the whole propeller falling off and cutting us in half as we drove by.
• Nebraska is the "Home of Arbor Day," and they are very proud of it.  Whatever you do, do NOT make comments like "Geez, THAT's the best they can come up with?"  They are pretty touchy about it.
• The only thing creepier then one wind turbine spinning slowly by itself, is a whole FIELD of turbines standing DEAD STILL amongst old, brown corn crops.  Looked like what was left after Armageddon.
• Miss Priss LOVES pancakes.  However, she ABHORS McDonald's pancakes.  After two breakfasts of untouched pancakes, we will never be ordering those again.
• Always depend on the kindness of strangers.  Well, not really STRANGERS, per se, they were actually family that I don't talk to enough.  (And before you get on me with "how can you NOT stay in touch with your family???" let me cut you off with a couple facts.  A) My mom is one of fourteen kids.  B) I have something like 122 cousins.  Yeah, let me see YOU keep up!)  We were fortunate enough to stay with relatives for three out of four overnights of our trip.  So much better, more fun, and cheaper then hotels!
• But if you have to stay in a hotel in a deserted state like Utah, be sure to book it the day before.  My planner of a husband made sure to book a room (actually because of the dog) in advance, and we found out when we got there that the whole town was booked solid.  Turns out there was a whole slew of geologists and other scientific type people in town till December to check out the area for drilling.  Yeah, right, "drilling."  Bet there was an alien ship that landed and they're hunting down aliens AS WE SPEAK! 
• Don't pick up hitchhikers in Utah.  They might be aliens.
• Wind Turbines are NOT man made, as I had originally thought.  They actually have little windy babies.  I saw this on a mountain slope at the Nevada/California line.  Big, tall turbines, standing with their itty bitty baby turbines.
• NEVER try to leave Las Vegas after noon on a Sunday, headed toward Los Angeles.  Stay, play the slots, do some shopping.  You're not going to get anywhere anyway.
• I've said it before and I'll say it again.  Cali people drive like MANIACS!!!  There's no such thing as "defensive driving" here.  People would rather see you run into a guard rail then give you room to merge into traffic. 

I am so happy to be back on the ol' blog again!  We're still busily unpacking, so it'll be a bit before I'm totally back to bloggy normalness.  Still, it's so great to be around the Blogiverse again!  Can't wait to catch up with everyone!

Her New BFFs

Real quick, just wanted to show ya'll a pick of Miss Priss with her new BFFs...

Priss has INSISTED on bringing both Mickey & Minnie Mouse (Mouses?  Mice?) to the sitters with her today. 

She looks like such a little girl now!  Oh, it makes me want to cry.  Soon enough she'll be off to college and then married and then kids and then she'll never come home again!  I'm LOSING her!!!

Anyway, I wanted to thank you all so much for sending all the comment luv!  It's the highlight of my day to check my email and see all the great comments you've left for me!  Once all this moving mess if done and over with, I look forward to returning all the comments to you.  Packing is going along nicely and everybody is very excited to see hubby this THURSDAY!!!  I can't believe it's only three days! 

Today is supposed to be my posting day over at The Posh Parent.  I was too exhausted to get it done yesterday, and Jen at Posh Point of View was kind enough to let me off the hook.  So if you get a chance, head over to Posh Parent and check out the other contributors.  They've got lots of great info, a few snazzy giveaways (Baby Legs, anyone?) and some fun vlogs, too!

(Yeah, she's wearing SOCKS with her crocs.  Got a problem with that???)  :oD

PhotoStory Friday - On Edge

Hosted by Cecily and MamaGeek

Once Upon a Time, a Long, Long Time Ago (say, oh, four or five years), a dashing young man came home from cruise and told his fair maiden (the most beautiful in the land, by the way) all sorts of incredible stories about his time at sea.

One such tale involved some of his fellow shipmates (none he knew personally) who were playing football on the flight deck during their off-time.  They were having a great time, until one fellow decided to go a little too long and fell off the side of the ship.  There are no rails on the metal monster, and although there are nets to catch folks who might go over, they did not catch this poor soul.  He perished at sea.

Upon hearing such a sorrowful story, the fair maiden exclaimed to her beloved, "Don't you EVER go near the side of a ship EVER EVER AGAIN!"

The dashing hero rolled his eyes, and then the two lived Happily Ever After...

Fast forward a few years, one deployment, and one baby later, and the still-dashing little-bit-older man is once again on cruise, leaving behind his old lady and a newer, fairer maiden.

The old lady is in good spirits because her dashing hero is returning home to her.  Opening her email, she sees he has sent a new one, and Oh Look! there's an attachment!

"It was really windy today, so we took some pics on the flight deck," the message explained.

This being a "G-Rated" fairy tale, the old lady's response can not be recounted here.

ACK!

The Day The Earth Stood Still

I've mentioned before that we are currently looking for tenants to occupy the house that I'm making little progress packing up and gearing to move out of.  We've had several applicants and I'm happy to report that we've found tenants!  I have high hopes that they will be perfect, pay-on-time, make no mess, make no noise, live there forever kind of people!

Time will tell if my hopes become reality.

So I was showing the house the other day, when I was still taking apps, to three young chicas who wanted to be roommates.  We had toured the downstairs, we were in the middle of the upstairs, and then the one little chiquita says to me,

"Are you EXPECTING?"

I can only imagine what my face must have looked like, as I turned to her, thinking to myself,

"I'm EXPECTIN' I'm gonna kick your ASS!"

But I simply said, "No."

Trying to dig herself out of the hole, she added some inane comment about how, "Oh, cause when you were sitting on the couch, your stomach looked kind of...." and then she trailed off, maybe because I started walking away, maybe because her friends were giving her the "eye daggers" trying to make her shut up.

They really were nice girls.  They even tried to proclaim, "Yeah, you could say I look pregnant, too!"

A really mean part of my brain would have LOVED to say, "You're right.  I was WAY skinnier then you when I was your age!"  But I managed to hold that part in check.

The majority of my being wanted to grab my roll of cookie dough and crawl under the couch and live there forever with the dust bunnies and the toys and the remote control, of course, cause I could still see the TV from there.

I kept thinking of how I'd pick up hubby from the airport next week and, upon seeing me, he would scream, "AHHHH!!  WHY DID YOU EAT MY WIFE???"

But God, being the all-powerful, all-loving, merciful being that He is, decided to give me a wicked awful sore throat so I can't eat cookie dough anymore. 

Seriously, I don't get sore throats.  I get head colds.  I get bad coughs.  I can do body aches, nausea and even a little headache.  But I DON'T get sore throats!  I mean, it was so bad, I went to the doctor to make sure it wasn't Strep.  (It's not, by the way, so you don't have to burn this post after you read it.  But you might want to wash your hands.)

So how else would I get this if not for the Big Guy?  Apparently, He really wants hubby and I to stay together.  Maybe the sake of humanity depends on it!

So here I sit, surrounded by mashed potatoes and popsicles, dreaming about soda and cookies, wincing every time I swallow, and STILL PACKING!!!! 

But, hey, it could be worse, right?  RIGHT????